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Tavern Diary Volume 1


4.23.’98. 0:00am.
It’s April 23, ’98 today,
morn than one month after my last diary.
I was -so- busy for the past one month.
I started to rebuild Tavern with many new graphics:
My own icon has done.
Tavern is no more stable and symmetrical
with many new unbalanced spacing.
The 24×48 black cat was the starting
that brought the consequence graphics
and the consistent style.
There’re still many not done,
I’m working now.

I don’t know why,
but news seems to become the main part of this tavern.
That is not what I supposed to do.
I supposed to make a homepage of literature and discourse,
but it still became a homepage of news at last.
It is too hard for a Dalu Society member to make a homepage of literature, I think.
There’re about 10 people watching the tavern now.
That makes the pressure.
I have to be running forward and forward,
gathering new informations, making them on-line.
It’s very tiring, but it’s worthy.
I feel I’ve really done something important.
Someone is watching me.

Another largest change is in the
“Women’s Net Resource” session.
I’ve put in many female and lesbian websites which I was thinking.
I also put in many websites of organizations of social movements.
Some of them are not favored by me,
but there’re still posibilities for cooperation.
But not for those like Democratic and Prograssive Party,
State Building Party, State Building Associations
that I would never make cooperation with them.

Hey! I found I forgot to put in local feminism websites.
But some of them (just like TAPWER) are so disgusting!

I’ve reinstalled Windows 95 once tonignt.
The night I faxed the news inform
for the activities of protest against high-tuition fee inside NTU,
God dammed MS-Word suddenly downed.
I stayed all night finding the cause,
reinstalling Windows 95 once and once,
till 5:00am the first fax was made.

I’ve got another case these days
to be a translator in an international conference
for Solidarity Front of Wemon Workers.
But I can’t speak too much here.
I have to translate articles and write English mails.
I also planned to translate some articles from GAATW.
It’s so busy!

There’s a parade protesting against nuclear power,
but I haven’t put in the News session yet.

I hate the HEF (Humanistic Education Foundation).
Although they stood against High-Tuition fee policy too,
they promoted for the liberalization of private colleges.
What’s the difference between that and those economics scholars?
They always say, let the education run itself by marketing.
But where is the market?
The supply decides the prize arbitrarily,
and the demanding student can just pay.
Where is the regulation between demand and supply?
The main point is that:
Can Education be treated as goods selling in the free market?
Education is the important conduct to promote social streaming,
and social streaming is the most important thing of social justice.
Shouldn’t that be protected by the state?

I was planning for an article to fight the HEF,
but not done yet, too.

So many things undone, but so less time.

Wishing to make this place bigger.
Wishing to make a E-Mail Newspaper of social movements.
But all these require money.
It’s a little hard that I’m doing all by myself now.
And I have no job, no income.
I started to consider seriously about raising the fund.
I talked with Kathie a couple of days ago
about a long-time support network for student movement.
But that needs money, too.
Tavern has too strong my style,
not a good place to turned into a support network directly.
If I decide to raise the fund,
I’ll have to give up my personal style in this tavern.
Or should I make a whole new student support network?

One of my friend in TNT called me tonight.
They’ve got their precise URL.
That’s so releasing!
I shall have a fixed income from now on.
That’s the agreement between me and TNT for the writing and maintaining of TNT’s homepage.
Not too much, but it works.

Would you like to contribute to me? ^_*'

Ah, I have my personal BBS board at TKU ERA BBS now:
telnet 140.13.196.103, paperrose board,
or http://era.stat.tku.edu.tw:9999/boards/paperrose.
Please come visit me! ^_*'

3.16.’98. 0:00am.
Today is Mar.16.’98, exactly 10 days after I rented this place in GeoCities.
After several days of decadence without writing a word, I’m back.

I thought it is easy to write a short self-introduction.
That was before I wrote this page.
Finally I found its difficulty — I had NO idea what to write.
I was forced to face my inside emptiness and my past lacerations.
I deserted myself in the world of computer games
Without knowing what I want…

Yesterday I was tired.  I picked up ULTIMA VII again.
While watching the staff introduction alone with the moving soundtrack,
I was reminded the passions forgotten for so long…
I was so deeply in loved with the ULTIMA series before,
Believing it is the best game in the world.
There would never be a better one.
Accompanied with its moving soundtrack,
I was so impressed not by its cool graphic effect,
But the humanism attempt by the author, Richard Garriott.
From ULTIMA IV,
ULTIMA series had got rid of the tradition of Role-Playing Games (RPG) — to fight drakes and the big bad king,
Attempting to put philosophy and social questions inside,
Such as racism, collectivism, fascism… etc.
As Garriott said, he was not writing a game.
He was creating a world named “Britannia”
With its own self-satisfied economic and value system.
Then he laid the game screenplay into it.

I was so moved by such an attempt at that time…
“I’m creating a world, not just a game.”
…to create a world…
How long have I forgotten such passions?
From the moment I decided to rebel against the paternity tradition in Dalu Society,
For several years in Movements and in Net
I’d lost all the helping hands and fought all alone till now.
Now I have many younger schoolmates in Dalu Society.
I tell them time and time: Just do what you want.
Don’t be restricted by the tradition of this society.
I shall always be your company.
But I’ve never noticed I’m gradually exhausted from within.
When I’m saying I shall always be your company,
I’ve never have company of my own…

So I decided to restart from here,
To create a brand new world.

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